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I wish for you by ~sirenseranade11:iconsirenseranade11:

Categories Literature > Poetry > Human Nature > Fixed


I wish I could make things better
I wish things weren't so bad
I wish that we could be together
without ruining everything we had

I wish the sun shone longer
I wish people were kind
I wish I knew that this was real
and not all in my mind

I wish that I was stronger
I wish you hadn't lied
I wish that I could voice these thoughts
that make me want to hide

I wish I could accept this
I wish things weren't so hard
I wish my family were perfect
like everyone thinks they are

I wish that life was sturdy
I wish we never fought
I wish I could just run away
and not worry about getting caught

I wish I didn't love you
I wish you didn't care
I wish that everytime I cried
you weren't whispering in my hair

I wish that I was perfect
I wish you never frowned
I wish that I had no regrets
to forever hold me down

I wish she'd just get over you
I wish that life were fair
I wish you wouldn't sing me songs
and let me braid your hair

I wish that I was smarter
I wish that I could trust
I wish that I could wish for things
that didnt hurt so much
©2008-2009 ~sirenseranade11
:iconsirenseranade11:

Author's Comments

so much wishing
i like this format of poem
i did another one except that one was i hate
it flows well i think

Comments


love 0 0 joy 1 1 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:iconwerewolf-moon:
~werewolf-Moon May 20, 2008, 4:48:37 PM
I like this. =]

--
I never thought dreams could be reached, in till I looked in to the stars.
:iconsystemxov3rdr1ve:
~SyStemxOv3rDr1ve May 20, 2008, 4:48:58 PM
it's a really well written poem.

--
Person: What instrument do you play?
Me: The Fagott.
-
Band Rules,
Everything Else Falls Under CRACK.
:iconchasethisshotoffear:
~ChaseThisShotOfFear May 20, 2008, 4:49:10 PM
I like this a lot, its pretty full of emotion. Well written.
:iconsecretlineage:
~SecretLineage May 20, 2008, 4:58:38 PM
that's a really pretty poem. :) It goes along in a sing-song sort of way. The only thing is, some of the verses, the lines don't seem connected as in what it's actually talking about. an example:

"I wish that life was sturdy
I wish we never fought
I wish I could just run away
and not worry about getting caught"

The first two lines don't really correspond with the second two. You first talk about wanting a sturdy, stable life then talk about wanting to run away from it.

I hope you don't mind the constructive criticism. This is only my opinion. But you are an extremely talented writer, and keep it up! :clap: :D

--
Rules? Pfft. Rules are meant to bent, broken, and danced around! ;P
--
Rest Barbaro, you will forever be a champion in my heart and in the thousands you inspired
:iconmilestailsprower-007:
Mood: Joy =MilesTailsPrower-007 May 20, 2008, 5:14:35 PM
Ooh, I like the format, too. C:

The AB-AB rhyme scheme is actually really nice when handled well like this. The second verse is my favorite. That last line of it is really good. Sad, but kind of funny, too. 8D

Beautiful work!

--
"It's a frame of mind, you see!"
- Frederic Chopin (Eternal Sonata)
:iconkurenaix1234:
~kurenaix1234 May 21, 2008, 11:01:05 AM
very good cait,makes me think..

--
Turns out you like to play with knives and I hear it gives you a rush
:iconlardaholic:
=lardaholic May 21, 2008, 3:10:43 PM
Wow, cait.
God, i love your poetry.

.....
Yush. Very bueatiful.
Possibly the best you've ever written :o
:iconsirenseranade11:
~sirenseranade11 May 21, 2008, 5:00:44 PM
aww really you think?
that means alot to me erica, thanks
=]]
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